Miscarriages…Barren ..and here comes Mother’s Day

[Esther]

Miscarriages…Barren ..and here comes Mother’s Day

Well this may be a hard post to write. I have thought on this for several days on how to begin this need.

First of all let me say I know the King can do no wrong. He is in control of my life and only He knows what is best for me. Doesn’t mean I see it the same way. But by His grace I will endure it.

Almost two years ago, I turned 50 and realized that I was now to old for a prophecy given to me that I would have a child. My blood pressure shot up 210/110 which gave my doctor some concern. It was a very hard door to accept as closed.

After 3 miscarriages, 3 attempts to adopt not going through because of changes of their mind (when I refused to “buy” the baby) even going to the hospital to pick up one baby and left empty handed. The doctor actually aborted the last pregnancy because he thought I had already miscarried when in fact the baby was healthy.

Some people forget the husband’s grief when a child is lost. And know one can say anything that is going to really comfort you. All those “well your still young” comes back to haunt you years later. And the “well when are you going to start your family”?

But my point that I am trying to get to is how do you deal with what feels like a “slap in the face” every Mother’s Day. You want others to have their day, yet you feel like you have been found wanting in God’s eyes. The greatest pain sometimes is feeling like God has rejected you and you just don’t know why? What have I done that was so wrong? Where did I go wrong? Would I have been a bad mother?

Or was he answering a prayer, if my child will be lost then don’t give me a child, I would not be able to deal with that. I did ask a very wise prophet to pray for me that God would take the desire for a child away, but he said no, that God gives you that desire and it is the same desire for natural children that gives you the desire for spiritual children.

I have missed many Sunday morning services on Mother’s Day. Some years the pain is worse than others. This year I will be going to have Mother’s Day with my Mom.

But if anyone is out there that has learned how to cope with this better than I have, please tell me how you got pass this empty arm feeling.

I have to pray harder when I see people blessed with a baby and they abort it, because the Word says children are a blessing from God. So if you don’t have children does it mean you are not blessed of God? Then I read in the last days people will call you bless because you don’t have children. I can not tell you how many of my friends say that if they had it to do over again they would not have children, although they love their children, they have had to many problems with them.

But I also must remember God’s ways are higher than our ways, and His thoughts are higher than my thoughts.

This is just another test in trusting Him to do what is best for me. God is good all the time and He is no respecter of persons.

[Deonna]

Oh Sister,
although I cannot relate to the pain you feel I just want to give you a big *hug.* I just wish I could give you one in person. I can only slightly imagine the pain you must feel.

I turned 50 and realized that I was now to old for a prophecy given to me that I would have a child.
God is faithful to His promise. Hang on to it! Remember, Sarah was 90(?).

As for parents saying they wouldn't have children if they could do it all over again....they need to be careful saying that. If they were to lose one, the words they spoke would haunt them forever. Plus, how would their children feel to hear them say that? Unwanted and unloved.

I don't really know how to comfort you. My words seem inadequate but God cares and He knows the hurt you feel.

[Melody]

Miscarriages…Barren ..and here comes Mother’s Day

Well this may be a hard post to write. I have thought on this for several days on how to begin this need.

First of all let me say I know the King can do no wrong. He is in control of my life and only He knows what is best for me. Doesn’t mean I see it the same way. But by His grace I will endure it.

Almost two years ago, I turned 50 and realized that I was now to old for a prophecy given to me that I would have a child. My blood pressure shot up 210/110 which gave my doctor some concern. It was a very hard door to accept as closed.

After 3 miscarriages, 3 attempts to adopt not going through because of changes of their mind (when I refused to “buy” the baby) even going to the hospital to pick up one baby and left empty handed. The doctor actually aborted the last pregnancy because he thought I had already miscarried when in fact the baby was healthy.

Some people forget the husband’s grief when a child is lost. And know one can say anything that is going to really comfort you. All those “well your still young” comes back to haunt you years later. And the “well when are you going to start your family”?

But my point that I am trying to get to is how do you deal with what feels like a “slap in the face” every Mother’s Day. You want others to have their day, yet you feel like you have been found wanting in God’s eyes. The greatest pain sometimes is feeling like God has rejected you and you just don’t know why? What have I done that was so wrong? Where did I go wrong? Would I have been a bad mother?

Or was he answering a prayer, if my child will be lost then don’t give me a child, I would not be able to deal with that. I did ask a very wise prophet to pray for me that God would take the desire for a child away, but he said no, that God gives you that desire and it is the same desire for natural children that gives you the desire for spiritual children.

I have missed many Sunday morning services on Mother’s Day. Some years the pain is worse than others. This year I will be going to have Mother’s Day with my Mom.

But if anyone is out there that has learned how to cope with this better than I have, please tell me how you got pass this empty arm feeling.

I have to pray harder when I see people blessed with a baby and they abort it, because the Word says children are a blessing from God. So if you don’t have children does it mean you are not blessed of God? Then I read in the last days people will call you bless because you don’t have children. I can not tell you how many of my friends say that if they had it to do over again they would not have children, although they love their children, they have had to many problems with them.

But I also must remember God’s ways are higher than our ways, and His thoughts are higher than my thoughts.

This is just another test in trusting Him to do what is best for me. God is good all the time and He is no respecter of persons.


I too have skipped Mother's Day services because it was too hard. I had 5 miscarriages and 2 adoptions that failed to go through. Thankfully, I now have 2 miracles in my life to bless my home, but I remember all to well the anguish and dispair. Just remember that in the valley, He is the Lilly of the Valley. The only real way to conquer and obtain victory is through praise. One of the most beautiful aspects of the Lily of the Valley is its fragrence, the incense of praise will bless you and bring Glory to God. And to Jesus, the praise we give him for our trials is the most precious of all.

Rom 8:28 And we know that all things work together for good to them that love God, to them who are the called according to [his] purpose.

1Pe 4:12 Beloved, think it not strange concerning the fiery trial which is to try you, as though some strange thing happened unto you:
1Pe 4:13 But rejoice, inasmuch as ye are partakers of Christ's sufferings; that, when his glory shall be revealed, ye may be glad also with exceeding joy.

[Renee]

Sis. Ester,

I can't say that I know exactally what you are going thru. I have never had a miscarriage, but I have also never been pregnant. I have been married for almost 5 years, but still no baby. That is a horrible feeling also. I have missed Mother's Day services myself. It is rough watching others celebrate something that I long to be. I have not learned how to deal with it very well. I can't give you any good advice because I don't have any. All I can say is that I sorta feel your pain and know what you mean. May God bless you today.

[Esther]

Deonna,

Thanks for the hug.

[Esther]

Renee

One of the things you don't go through not having a miscarriage is all the questions. Was it a boy or girl, wish I could have held it in my hands. What went wrong.

But I know the feeling of waiting and hoping maybe this month, and then maybe I am, to find out a day or two later, no I'm not pregnant. Getting your hopes up and down.

And yes God is in control.

One person prophecied to me recently that the reason I don't have children is because of my ministry. Which is hard, when I see Sis. Nona Freeman with 5 children and a ministry. But, nevertheless, God is still in Control.

[NanaRenan]

Sister...I can't truly fathom your misery, but I can try. My sister never had any -- and while I was having mine she would tease me about having a couple for her when I was done having my own. I always suspected it was more than teasing. This was confirmed when she got very upset because I had to have a hysterectomy at 27.

Her and her husband spent their savings on in vitro, which never took. Then didn't have the money for private adoption. State adoption was out of the question because of his age. So never a baby.

I would encourage you, as I have her, to find a way to turn that pain and misery into something positive. Something to glorify God. Find a work in your church that works with children -- Sunday school, nursery, etc. Or outside the church -- rock babies at the hospital, work with troubled teens, become a court advocate for children.....there are lots of things you can do. Foster parenting. I know none of this would take the place of having your own, but it would give you a chance to touch lives -- and to show God's love to others.

God gave us tremendously big hearts filled to overflowing with love. Find a place to pour it out in Jesus Name. I think it would help heal your hurt and prevent the devil from trying to torment you with doubts and questions.
God bless you. You'll be in my prayers.

[EvangSims]

My Sisters!

I want to hug all of you who have lost babies. I have one son and never miscarried. I always said, he was meant to be here. I wasn't saved when I got pregnant with him, neither was I married. I had backsliden. However, God used that child to draw me back to Him! I am so thankful for my son.

At the age of 5 he received the Holy Ghost and was baptized in Jesus name. I take parenting very seriously and when I was blessed with him (after my mother and aunt lost their first child) I knew that I was blessed to carry him full term and deliver a beautiful child.

In the hospital, in my backslidden state, I laid hands and prayed over every part of his body that he would be healthy and safe. When he was 9 months old I pressed to church one Sunday morning (not knowing why I was rushing to get there) and within 15 minutes into the service, I was on my knees crying out to God and speaking in tounges. I didn't "plan" on giving my life back to God that day because I had a new pack of cigarettes in my purse!!!

But I do want to encourage my sisters who desire to be a mother. As it's been posted, we have a witness in Sarah. It's not over until God says so hold on to your faith. I preached a message once, "Nothing Can Stop My Destiny!" If you are destined to have children naturally or through adoption, then no devil, demon or physical condition can stop your destiny.

I'm standing in faith with you, my sisters!

Love you and praying with you,
Evang. Sims
www.keciasims.org (http://www.keciasims.org)

[Renee]

Renee

One of the things you don't go through not having a miscarriage is all the questions. Was it a boy or girl, wish I could have held it in my hands. What went wrong.

But I know the feeling of waiting and hoping maybe this month, and then maybe I am, to find out a day or two later, no I'm not pregnant. Getting your hopes up and down.

And yes God is in control.

One person prophecied to me recently that the reason I don't have children is because of my ministry. Which is hard, when I see Sis. Nona Freeman with 5 children and a ministry. But, nevertheless, God is still in Control.
The thing that makes it even worse is being prophecied over right after first being married and told you will have children. He whispered in my ear, "I hear the pitter patter of little feet". After a few years of nothing, it is so horrible to think back on that.

No, I don't have the questions like you have, but I do have my own questions. "What is wrong with me?" "Why can't I just give my husband children?" "I wonder if people look at me differently because I don't have children?"

Then, you get those who ask you, "When are you going to have kids?" Or, "You don't have any kids yet?" You just feel like crawling under a rock and hiding.

All of my cousins that are married have children. One of my cousins was even pregnant before she got married. I just don't understand sometimes. I have asked my husband over and over, "Why do they get to have a baby and I don't?" It just doesn't seem right. There is a song that I like and some of the lyrics says:

How can two people who built a loving home,
Try for years and never have a child of their own?
And somewhere out there tonight there is a baby noone's holding tight,
In need of love? To me that dont' add up.
Sorry to keep rambling.

[ddc101]

Okay its just me but to tell a woman who has not children things like.....when are you going to have children or I hear the pitter patter of little feet is very insensitive.

For those who are older and barren how about foster children? There are so many children who could really use a great mentor.I have three children and have lost one.I remember the pain of that.But thats not what makes me a woman.What makes me a woman is Jesus Christ and his plan for my life.He made me wonderfully and fearfully.My identity is in Jesus Christ.

Another thing you can do is become immersed in childrens ministry.That way you get to be around lots of children and don't have to clean up after them at home.

I want to say that I was medically said not to ever be able to bear children and I have three but there is a space of ten years between the first and second and seven years between the second and third.If I could I would have another because I love children and always have.But honestly I just accepted the no kids ever thing.These children were a complete surprise.

You say...yeah but you have children.Hey I will share.Look around you.There are sisters who have their hands full during service.How about being a helper to them.And as far as ministry is concerned it matters not whether one is with or without children.But its cheaper not to have them especially if you have to suffer financially.

I want to be especially sensitive to those who are without children this mothers day.Also I want to add that I have been ministering to women as of late who have lost their children to the welfare system.They also have empty arms this mothers day.

For me its not the no children issue.Its the issue of my mom being dead.Her favorite song was "I know I'm saved." It seems every mothers day the song
they sing "This World is not my Home."......I have a loving mother way up in gloryland.....lv sis.c

[Melody]

Would you be willing to babysit for a single mother? Be a foster grandmother?

I know myself that one of my biggest hindrences in finding employment is finding childcare that I trust. My children don't have grandparents, I would love for someone to care enough about them to want to be their grandparents.

[Renee]

Okay its just me but to tell a woman who has not children things like.....when are you going to have children or I hear the pitter patter of little feet is very insensitive.
Sister, the pitter patter comment was from the preacher who prophecied over me. The other comments come from everyone else.

[Esther]

Sisters, I thank each of you for what you have contributed. But I will be honest with you. I have started Children Church Ministries in two different churches, I have taught High School Sunday School. My niece that lives in the same town as I do has 3 wonderful children that she allows me to spoil. They even call me Mimi. I have baby sitted for Mothers, kept the nursery. Called about be a foster parent and was told they didn't need any. Although, I found that hard to believe, I accepted it (finally) as God's will for me not to go in that direction.

But I can truthfully tell you it doesn't fill the void. Christmas mornings you think how much fun it must be to watch excited children open their presents with laughter and joy. No birthday parties to plan and mark another year of treasures. Even though you do a lot with children, you don't bring them home and tuck then in at night. You don't cook them a good wholesome meal.

But I say again, God is in control and He knows what He is doing. It just is not always easy to accept, because somehow you feel perhaps you are just found not worthy. And yes I know Sarah was 90 but she did have a handmaiden to help. :)

I think because it is something that God puts in a woman to desire children, those who have children can't truly relate to. And many try and that counts a lot. My sister has been good to share her children. My sister-in-law has been good to share her children also, they have called me on Mothers Day to wish me happy Mother's Day. Even though I appreciate it, I sometimes feel undeserving of it and other times, I think, well I did have a baby sort of, just didn't make it to maturity and live. Does that count as being a Mother? If so, then that makes my husband a father.
Which means I have shorted him 31 years of gifts. :)

This is a situation I have to trust Him. No one but Jesus can know how deeply it hurts. But I will praise Him anyway, for who He is. He is worthy.

I can't talk to my husband about it because he hurts also. I feel I let him down, but Jesus is the giver of life, not me.

Well I must go the tears are too many.

Love you and thank you for praying for all the women that want children that have yet to experience that joy.

Grace, Love, Peace and Joy in Jesus

[luv2prazehim]

I have recentlu just this last year lost my own baby, i was pregnant for the first time and was very excited. Finally, no one would be asking us "so when are you guys going to have kids", i was also very excited because two of my close friends were also pregnant. However, i lost my baby and it hurts so bad. It hurts to see my friends with their healthy babies and for me to look down at my arms are empty. I read a wise saying that said "I can be changed by what happens to me, however i refuse to be reduced by it. I took that to heart and wouldn't let the devil reduce my joy or my love for god.

Mark 11:24

[ddc101]

I have recentlu just this last year lost my own baby, i was pregnant for the first time and was very excited. Finally, no one would be asking us "so when are you guys going to have kids", i was also very excited because two of my close friends were also pregnant. However, i lost my baby and it hurts so bad. It hurts to see my friends with their healthy babies and for me to look down at my arms are empty. I read a wise saying that said "I can be changed by what happens to me, however i refuse to be reduced by it. I took that to heart and wouldn't let the devil reduce my joy or my love for god.

Mark 11:24


Sister I am so sorry for you.No words can express the loss of a child.
Whether they were just conceived,just born or an adult it is never easy.lv sis.c

[Former PK]

Esther,

I completely understand, my wife and I are in the same boat. Early 40's and have tried all of the doctors ideas that we feel morally comfortable with.

Sis Cooper,

I think you are missing the point, I don't want to play with someone elses kids, I want one to take home. Don't get me wrong, I don't hate kids, quite the contrary. They're not mine. It is especially hard on my side of the family, I'm the only male decendant on my Dad's side of the family for 4 generations.

[NanaRenan]

But I say again, God is in control and He knows what He is doing. It just is not always easy to accept, because somehow you feel perhaps you are just found not worthy.
Sister...His ways are NOT our ways.

If He worked like we did, every woman who wanted a child would have as many as she wanted. And every woman who didn't deserve one would never have one.

I can't begin to understand -- none of us can. I used to make blankets and clothes for the preemies at the big county hospital. One day the social worker asked if I"d like to go tour the NICU. I did and will never forget one tiny set of twins -- just under a pound each. They were the 9th and 10th children of a crack-addicted prostitute who was arrested and removed from the hospital within hours of giving birth because she had so much drugs in her system. Five of her other children had survived and were in foster care around the state.

Why God "blesses" people like that with children and not righteous women such as yourself, I'll never understand. I've asked that about my sister many times over the last 20+ years since she married. My husband says we'll understand it all when we enter His presence.

I know there is nothing anyone can do and no one who can relieve your pain but Him. But I do hope you'll stop questioning what part your own worth would play in this.

The Bible says not a sparrow falls to the ground that He isn't aware of it and that we are worth more than many sparrows. He knows your pain and loves when you glorify Him even in your pain.

{{{hugs}}}

[tufluv]

It is remarkable that those who don't want, nor care for children, have bunches of them.

And those who can't, don't. I feel the pain in this thread its overwhelming., and although I've had 3 healthy sons..I can't even imagine life without them without tearing up. They are what has made my life worth living; I accomplished at least 3 good things in my life amongst so much wrong.

I have no answers either. I only can say that like so many other things that happen to us, there may never be palpable answers in the here and now. I've learned that we must accept the good along with the bad., continue marching forward towards that goal, head held up, smile on face - and a continous praise on our lips for our LORD, for HE alone sees the big picture. HE knows whats ahead, and HE wishes we'd just trust HIM, in the here and now.

We sometimes forget how much HE loves us..as we can relate in loving our own children. HE knows, feels, shares our pain, and it is within HIS reach/ability to do something about it...I believe that HE will, but in HIS own timing. It HAS to be in HIS timing., for HIS grand purposes.
Which is so different from our impatient timing, right!? :spin:

I will be praying for each one of you that hurts so deeply inside, that our blessed LORD fill that emptiness with HIS own love, HIS caresses..and that HE will wipe all tears away very soon.
Lets praise HIM, sing songs of worship, to HIM, as we all await HIS mightly move of hand in our lives. Rejoice! and again I say - Rejoice! :banana:

[Jillian]

My heart goes out to those of you wanting children. I suffered two miscarriages and my first daughter was stillborn. I will never forget the hurt and pain I felt.
I went on to have 3 healthy lovely children, for which I am thankful.
I have two different friends that after 14 and 15 years of marriage they finally had children. Do not give up, I will help you pray also and may God bless each of you.

[ddc101]

Esther,

I completely understand, my wife and I are in the same boat. Early 40's and have tried all of the doctors ideas that we feel morally comfortable with.

Sis Cooper,

I think you are missing the point, I don't want to play with someone elses kids, I want one to take home. Don't get me wrong, I don't hate kids, quite the contrary. They're not mine. It is especially hard on my side of the family, I'm the only male decendant on my Dad's side of the family for 4 generations.


Brother I am not missing the point.Why not adopt or become a foster parent? Also there are bunches of children at Tupelo Childrens Mansion that would love to live in a good home.I have many friends who have not been able to have children.I realize that you want your own but could this be selfish possibly if you have a nice home and means and do not want to take in someone who would love to have a daddy to play football or baseball or take them to the library.You don't have to see your face on their face in order to see your face in their heart.I would adopt in a minute or become a foster mom.In fact several times we have taken people in to live with us and finished raising them.I have a daughter in the Lord who is in her late twenties now and raising her own family.lv sis.c

[Qwizcoach]

Sisters and brother,

My husband and I understand all too well! We lost our first child through miscarriage and then had sweet little Jacob. We just this past week lost our next child. Went for a sono and they couldnt' find the heart beat and I had to have surgery. It is very had to lose!!!!! (even if you have a child). WE were so excited! The kids were going to be close in age (which I really wanted).............Lord willing we will try again this summer. It doesn't erase the pain, grief or answer any questions.............but God is always with us and we lean on him for our peace.

[Former PK]

Brother I am not missing the point.Why not adopt or become a foster parent? Also there are bunches of children at Tupelo Childrens Mansion that would love to live in a good home.I have many friends who have not been able to have children.I realize that you want your own but could this be selfish possibly if you have a nice home and means and do not want to take in someone who would love to have a daddy to play football or baseball or take them to the library.You don't have to see your face on their face in order to see your face in their heart.I would adopt in a minute or become a foster mom.In fact several times we have taken people in to live with us and finished raising them.I have a daughter in the Lord who is in her late twenties now and raising her own family.lv sis.c


Your question is most valid. The wifes OB/GYM gave her a list of recommended agencies. The thought of TMC has crossed the mind. I'm just VERY reluctant.

I will be perfectly transparent here: (Flame ON )

3 Reasons:

1) Exactly the same reason you should buy a puppy from the Pet Story. You have no knowlege of who or how they have been messed up from the start.

2a) In many cases it is a random drawing

2b) Please pardon the technical references: Personallity is 70% genetic. If they are your kids, there is a strong chance you won't be surprised by they way they act. If they are not your kids there is only 30% that can be effected by environment. Those odds are scary.

Now granted, this is being HARD, COLD and maybe CRUEL. But it is the way I see it.

It seems that the ratio of good stories to horror stories is about equal. Again those aren't good odds.

[ddc101]

Since this is a good report and is going to fatten some bones I want to post it here.We are friends with a couple who are in the ministry.They were never able to conceive though married at the same times as us.Well as the years went by they decided they had alot of love to give.Then became foster parents.Last year I got several very encouraging phone calls to say that the children had been baptised and received the Holy Ghost.That to me is enough to make the difference regardless of personality.
Even though we have three children,I had one before we married.
After I got saved I met my husband and together we have two daughters.
We together have taken in about five people to live with us.They are all now living for Jesus and successful.And if God wills we will take in more.
Sometimes we have to take chances and hope for the best.lv sis.c

[Melody]

Another GOOD report, my "daughter" has been with me since she was 3 1/2 years old. Her mother was a stripper and by 19 had 3 children by 3 different fathers and gave them all away.
My little girl received the Holy Ghost when she was 6 years-old and is the first one to worship in service. She reads and studies her bible and fasts on her own volition. My natural son shows no spiritual awareness at all even though much prayer and fasting has been poured out for him. He was baptized but seems to see no need to seek the Holy Ghost.
I have been assured that this not uncommon for boys and continue to pray for him. You will never know what a blessing you could be until you step out in faith.

[Esther]

I did not get to be with my Mom as planned, and I did go to church and made if fine. Thanks for all your prayers.

[Deonna]

What about New Beginnings? I know of an older couple that adopted through them....and I know Bro Velie's family (he's the one over it there in Mississippi). I'm sure they'd work with any couple who wants to give a newborn a chance.

Foster care is another way to lead to adoption. I'm sorry that didn't work out for you Esther, but maybe keep trying every once in a while. Persistence pays off sometimes. I know of a couple that were unable to have children, did foster care, and ended up adopting the two boys they fostered.

MELODY: Awesome report! :banana:


NanaRenan: Sister...I can't truly fathom your misery, but I can try. My sister never had any -- and while I was having mine she would tease me about having a couple for her when I was done having my own. I always suspected it was more than teasing. This was confirmed when she got very upset because I had to have a hysterectomy at 27.

Her and her husband spent their savings on in vitro, which never took. Then didn't have the money for private adoption. State adoption was out of the question because of his age. So never a baby.

Though my circumstance is not quite the same, it is similar. My sister resents me and hasn't spoken to me in years. I asked my mother "WHY????" She said it's from jealousy and pain. She was barely able to have one son and has been unable to have anymore. They think she never will because of the scar tissue from her C-section. It hurts her deeply....and it hurts me too.

[Renee]

I know this thread has dropped down quite a bit and Mother's Day is past, but I had something happen today that just ripped my heart out. I know that it was an innocent thing sent out without knowledge, but it still hurt very badly.

I was going through the mail today and I had something from our health insurance company. It was a simple little mailer probably sent to all females of child bearing age. It said something like, "Pregnant? We will send you a $25 gift if you visit your doctor within the first three weeks." It was something similar to that. Now, I know it was sent out to get women to see their doctors, but for me it was heart wrenching. I got so angry, I immediately tore it up and threw it down. I was seeming to take my anger out on JW, when I realized I wasn't mad at him, I was mad at the mailer. I told him that and just started crying so hard. He comforted me and told me that it would happen one day. I wanna start crying right now just thinking about his compassion in this matter.

I know this may sound trivial to some, but it was aweful to me. I know I acted out in the wrong way, but it hurt so badly. Okay, I just had to get that off of my chest. Sorry, to bore you with my silly emotions.

God bless!

[Esther]

Renee,

I am so sorry. I am here crying with you. I know how painful you feel. And as the tears run down my cheeks I have to tell you, God can do no wrong. His timing is perfect. We surely don't understand it I know that. But I do know He is our Comforter in times like these. I pray right now that Jesus will wrap His arms of love around you and your husband right now. That He will bless your home with peace.

And maybe God was letting you know that it is going to happen, perhaps even soon, be prepared.

I wish I had the words of compassion that you surely need right now. But my experience is there are none. Only Jesus can satisfy the longing in your soul. When you get down, just give a sacrifice of praise to God. It is a sacrifice when you don't "feel" like doing it, but peace will come and God's power will keep you.

If there is anything I can do for you please let me know.

Grace, peace, love and joy to you in Jesus,

[Renee]

Renee,

I am so sorry. I am here crying with you. I know how painful you feel. And as the tears run down my cheeks I have to tell you, God can do no wrong. His timing is perfect. We surely don't understand it I know that. But I do know He is our Comforter in times like these. I pray right now that Jesus will wrap His arms of love around you and your husband right now. That He will bless your home with peace.

And maybe God was letting you know that it is going to happen, perhaps even soon, be prepared.

I wish I had the words of compassion that you surely need right now. But my experience is there are none. Only Jesus can satisfy the longing in your soul. When you get down, just give a sacrifice of praise to God. It is a sacrifice when you don't "feel" like doing it, but peace will come and God's power will keep you.

If there is anything I can do for you please let me know.

Grace, peace, love and joy to you in Jesus,

Sis. Esther,

Thank you so much for your words of encouragement. You don't know how much they meant to me. I was able to put it past me before church, but it still stings when I think about it. Thanks again so much. You have truely blessed me with your words. God bless you as well.

[Apostolic Kitty]

Sorry, to bore you with my silly emotions.
Your emotions are not silly or boring. They are real and valid.

[Melody]

I know this thread has dropped down quite a bit and Mother's Day is past, but I had something happen today that just ripped my heart out. I know that it was an innocent thing sent out without knowledge, but it still hurt very badly.

I was going through the mail today and I had something from our health insurance company. It was a simple little mailer probably sent to all females of child bearing age. It said something like, "Pregnant? We will send you a $25 gift if you visit your doctor within the first three weeks." It was something similar to that. Now, I know it was sent out to get women to see their doctors, but for me it was heart wrenching. I got so angry, I immediately tore it up and threw it down. I was seeming to take my anger out on JW, when I realized I wasn't mad at him, I was mad at the mailer. I told him that and just started crying so hard. He comforted me and told me that it would happen one day. I wanna start crying right now just thinking about his compassion in this matter.

I know this may sound trivial to some, but it was aweful to me. I know I acted out in the wrong way, but it hurt so badly. Okay, I just had to get that off of my chest. Sorry, to bore you with my silly emotions.

God bless!


I went through something similiar, After my Michael died I kept getting mailers addressed to Michael for baby toys and furniture etc.. I finally had to admit to myself that it wasn't personal. There was no intention to hurt, but that didn't stop the hurting. Grief is something that time and the grace of Jesus will take care of. You will never forget them but the pain of the loss does lessen. Now I tell people that I have a host of children waiting to great me on that other shore and I CAN'T be lost or I will miss them again.

[someonehere]

hey.. i'm new here, and not sure if i'm postin right.. but i couldn't help but notice this post.. even though mothers day is over.. i just wanted to say that to all you ladies who aren't mothers yet.. NEVER give up hope.. I couldn't have kids the first 5 years of my marriage, and to some that might seem like a short time, but i KNOW that HE is able to do exceedingly abundantly above all we could ask or think and that HE will give us the desires of our hearts.. in the first 3 years of marriage, i didn't have the holy ghost, and i didn't live for God... i was raised catholic, and didn't know the truth until i was 21 years old.. I wanted a baby so bad, and I too would get sad or mad that i didn't have kids.. it just didn't seem fair.. and after i came to god i prayed and looked in the bible for some promise to hold to that i could and would have kids.. i talked to other women who had wanted kids and god blessed and talked to other women in my same situation.. one lady had said that about delighting in the lord in all of thine ways and he'll give u the desires of ur heart and said she clung to that promise.. and i read thru scriptures about how if we shall ask ANYTHING in HIS name that HE WILL DO IT.. i reminded God that His word said this.. one night in prayer, God told me that July 7th i would have a baby.. well.. this was 9 monthes away at the time he told me this.. and as monthes went on.. i wasnt' pregnant.. but kept believing that somehow it was true because God can't lie.. then july 7th came and went.. and i was discouraged but told God i KNEW that there was some reason.. and kept holding to His promise to me even though that day had came and went.. and the only thing me and my husband could figure was maybe we would adopt a baby that was born on july 7th.. well a few monthes later.. like maybe september.. i found out i was pregnant.. and a woman at our church worked in the ultrasounds at a womens clinic and gave me a free ultrasound.. when she gave us the estimated conceptrion date it was july 5th give or take a couple days.. which I know it had to have been july 7th!! I did have my baby july 7th, she wasnt in my arms yet but in my tummy.. and since then he blessed me with another baby girl so i now have two girls ages 7 and 5.. i still don't use birth control, and haven't gotten pregnant again, but it was prophesied that i would have a son, and i'm holding to that promise.. i don't know how or when.. but i know that God can't lie.. so those of you who are 50 or 40 and still no babies.. all i can say is KEEP trusting in him.. HE CAN"T LIE!! if He said you were going to have a baby.. you will!!! Hold to those promises and your trust in Him and keep on believing.. i know your pain u feel on mothers day and i know how sad it is.. and i still get sad that i haven't had another yet.. but i can only trust in Him that he knows best.. since i've had my babies.. one of my friends who had been married for 12 years and had no babies has had a little baby girl Praise the Lord!! God is still doing miracles and He is still the same yesterday today and forever!!! We serve an awesome God people.. trust in Him with all of your heart, and there is NOTHING wrong with reminding Him of the prophesies you've been givin or with the words of the bible that give us promises.. Hold to them.. remind Him and yourself those promises.. He will make a way where there seems to be no way.. I will keep all of you in my prayers, because i KNOW what God has done for me He will do for you ALL!! in JESUS NAME.. i BELIEVE!!! God bless you all!