struggle with holiness....normal?

[Renee29]

Hi Ladies,

I'm a first generation Pentecostal. I was saved at 17. Backslide at 21 and returned to church at 23. I am currently 29. I struggle with holiness in the sense that I feel conflicted within myself. On one hand I'm proud of holiness and on the other hand it makes me feel physically unattractive. It doesn't help that my husband finds me more attractive adorned. Have you struggled with this? How have you overcome?

[tufluv]

Not even, Renee29! I am also 1stGen. I was never much for makeup anyway, (your other thread!) so it was easy to leave that-I used to only wear it for work anyway, and I left that type work behind as well! My husband never liked it either, he is so-o easy to please, I'm lucky!! I always 'hated' the feel and look of makeup, and now when I see it on other women of the world, it makes me... well, I'll refrain from expressing it-don't want to offend. I know that the world has certain standards of perception of what is 'sexually' attractive, I don't care for it.
Dress as well, when GOD mercifully took me back and saved me, he also gifted me with the spiritual discernment (HG) to see how he really meant us women to be, dress, attitude, etc., I am grateful for this new more abundant life, I am truly free from all those worldly vanities for women, and wrong attitudes. I now see the err of my past life, and I am content with my 'new look' as well! So is my husband.
BUT for what its worth, you asked a question, I had to comment!
We all have our beliefs. I wish you happiness in your marriage. ;)

[Renee29]

Tufluv,

I'm glad you feel that way. I want to feel that way. I do have personal convictions about alot of standards, but not all. I have prayed and prayed for God to give me convictions with the things I struggle with. I do live the standards because I'm on the platform, but it would make my life so much easier if I had convictions and felt good about it.

[foreverblessed]

Renee, Is your husband in church?

[tufluv]

Originally posted by Renee29
Tufluv,

I'm glad you feel that way. I want to feel that way. I do have personal convictions about alot of standards, but not all. I have prayed and prayed for God to give me convictions with the things I struggle with. I do live the standards because I'm on the platform, but it would make my life so much easier if I had convictions and felt good about it.

Okay, well pray about it, research the scriptures, GOD will reveal the truth, but you must be ready to recognize and accept it., no holds barred! Conviction, as you say. I got mine almost right away! I was so-o ready to leave that old world that cause me nothing but misery, BEHIND! Except for my children, I needed no reminders from that past.
Being a born-again child of GOD, means you get to start over! Out with the old in with the new! Old ways-out the door!(and don't look back!) look forward to the 'new creation' you...created by GOD's own hand, not ours! He knew what he was doing when he designed you or me, and he can redesign as needed.
A good question was just posed and I was wondering this myself, is your husband a saved Apostolic!?
That may have some bearing on this.

[Renee29]

Yes, my husband is in church. However, he does feel that the UPC goes overboard in some areas of holiness even thought their motives are pure.

[akacts238]

Renee29,

Allow me to begin by saying that each one of us is a first generation believer. We must understand that we are the sons and daughters of God. We are begotten by the Word. Born of the Water and Spirit. Our heritage is Jesus.

We belong to the church born in the Book of Acts. This is the beginning of Pentecost – not Azusa Street… Jesus is the vine and we are His branches. He alone is our root.

Truth did not evolve out of false doctrine nor did it gradually reappear – Truth always was; always is; and always will be. Truth did not go anywhere – it was there all the time. Man moved – Not God.

The devil has deceived many saints into believing that a “lack of fleshly Pentecostal heritage” is an excuse to walk contrary to our Father’s Word. This is a lie! You must see yourself as belonging to Jesus. Do not think that you have been slighted because you do not have a fleshly heritage – you do not need one – the flesh is nothing – man boasts in his flesh – but the Bible says that if we are to boast in anything let us boast in the Lord.

Hebrews talks about the better covenant that Jesus beckons us to enter into with Him. This is an eternal covenant – a beautiful covenant.

God says in Leviticus 20:26 …”ye shall be holy unto me: for I the Lord am holy, and have severed you from other people, that ye should be mine.” The word “severed” implies a forcible and complete separation, as by cutting off a part from a whole. You are now cut off from other people so that you now belong to God. He loves you. You are now in a covenant relationship with Him. No one can separate you from God. He severed you from the old life and all of its wickedness and death. You now are free to walk with God. You are free to stay and free to go. There are no chains binding you to Him. It is simply a matter of choice. God does not force you to love Him – you love Him by choice.

As you saturate your mind with God’s Word, you will begin to fall in love with Him like never before. It is not a dream world, but a reality. It is not a pity party – but a powerful life. There will be difficult times and much persecution from within the church and without. It will be through these times that Jesus will reveal himself in an even greater way than you know him now.

Holiness is not about pride – it is about Jesus. We are now members of his royal family. We are his peculiar people. His holiness is beautiful and protective.

When you are feeling a conflict – a right and a wrong – then you know what is right and what is wrong. You simply do what you know is right and do not look for an excuse to do what is wrong. God will not make you live holy and your flesh and the devil will see to it that you don’t “feel a conviction.” You must walk by faith – if the Bible says it, then it is so. You do not have to feel it, nor do you have to understand everything to walk. Just walk and Jesus will show you why you do what you do. For example, when you were baptized, you did not understand the depth of Calvary, but that did not keep you from following the Word and getting baptized. I am not advocating that you follow blindly what people do or say. Try the spirits to see whether they are of God by studying His Word.

You must have a made-up mind to walk with Jesus. His holiness is a privilege, it is beautiful, and it is powerful. Few people in Pentecost understand the power of God’s holiness. Even many who preach it, who wear the clothes, talk the talk, and write the books, etc. have missed it.

You state that your motivation for living a standard is to be on the platform. You are being a hypocrite by pretending to believe something that you do not believe. Your motivation is wrong and therein lies the problem. The source of your motivation is man, not God. Let your motivation for everything that you do be Jesus. If this means that you are not on the platform, then so be it. True holiness is not a standard set by man, but rather holiness is a lifestyle born out of a right relationship with Jesus. Take time to nurture your relationship with your Father. You are troubled and not at peace. Learn of Jesus – take His yoke upon you – for He is meek and lowly in heart: and you shall find rest for your soul. There is peace in the knowledge of God. Jesus harshly condemned the hypocrites in the religious movement of His day. God would have you to be genuine – without guile (deception).

Repent of being double-minded and from this day forward be genuine, honest, and seek earnestly to know the ways of God. It is very simply a choice – and it is one that only you can make. The pastors, elders, leaders, etc. cannot make this choice for you. They cannot dictate your relationship with Jesus, though there are many who will try. Be strong in the Lord and in the power of His might. Take delight in what Jesus will show you about His power in His holiness.

Respectfully,

Akacts238

[ddc101]

Hi Sister Renee,
The best advice I can give you is to immerse yourself in the word of God.To spend as much time in prayer and pursueing a closer walk with Jesus.I will not tell you to stop doing what you are doing.For I believe that you have to start somewhere.If you are obeying even if you do not feel like it that is good.It means Renees flesh is being made to do something it does not like.What you need to do is ask Jesus to open up an understanding of his word to you.I understand what you mean by not being first generation is that you are having to learn what pleases God now instead of having godly examples to follow.I understand that.Just let the Lord lead you and guide you.It many end up where you have more personal convictions about things than the pastor.Who knows for sure what dedications and consecrations Jesus may lead you to in prayer.But whatever and whereever he leads you FOLLOW and OBEY.lv sis.c

[pentecostal mom]

Renee, what have really helped alot of people that I know that have had this type of conflict is Family teaching. We have this at our church in adult SS from Mother's day to Father's Day. It covers everything from right relationships in marriage divorse standards you name it. Also, I have read books--I think it was one of Ruth Reider's books about extra protection on a family because of the wife's submission. Now I ask you what husband wouldn't want extra protection and blessings of God. Also pray that God will change your husband's desire about these things. My husband every once in a while will see and old picture of me and say oohh I love those painted lips but I think he is more teasing about it than anything. And too, it reminds him of the "dating days" so if he starts that I try to "Spice things up a bit" just not by wearing make-up.

[Marie]

Renee29
Just reaching out and seeking help is a big step in the right direction. It is good that you live by the standards set out by your Pastor, because in your submission, you are pleasing God. It would be different if you were doing it with a rebellious attitude, but it sounds like your heart is in the right place. If you are concerned about your husband not finding you attractive, you need to pray for him and for yourself. For yourself, try asking Jesus to help you become more pleasing to HIM and to become the wife your husband needs. It won't be a change in your physical looks that makes the difference. It is not the outward changes that make the difference between an attractive woman and a beautiful woman. This takes a spiritual change and it is not always something obvious (or big) that turns things around. When you pray, ask God to help you be aware of the LITTLE things that you can do to make a difference. Remember, Jesus CHOSE you! You are His! That alone makes you very special. Everything little thing you do, no matter how small, needs to be done out of Love for Him, remembering how special you are to Him. Because He loves you so much, everything you do as you learn to give yourself to Him, is precious in His eyes. Do you remember when you first met your husband? Didn't it seem that every little thing he did was special. So it is with Jesus. He loves you Renee! With a love that cannot be compared to any other! As you learn to love Jesus with that special kind of love that will grow in you, you will become a woman more beautiful than ANY woman of the world! As you grow in your love for Jesus, you will find that you will love your husband with a new, deeper love. Believe me, your husband will see and feel the changes! He may not understand what the difference is, but he will notice.
While you are praying for yourself to be more pleasing to Jesus and your husband. Pray for your husband, that he would have a burning desire to learn to please HIM. Pray that he will learn to become the husband that you need and that you would both grow into the kind of love that God meant for a husband and wife. You will learn to please Jesus by doing the little things that make a difference in someone elses life. Don't try fitting into someone elses idea of what you should be or how you should dress. Yes, live by the standards, but don't do it because it is what others expect of you, do it because you love Jesus. I have seen this work! You will become a TRUELY beautiful, happy woman!
Remember also that you have Sisters that love you and want the best for you! You will be in my prayers!:)

[Apostolic Kitty]

Originally posted by Renee29
Hi Ladies, I'm a first generation Pentecostal. I was saved at 17. Backslide at 21 and returned to church at 23. I am currently 29. I struggle with holiness in the sense that I feel conflicted within myself. On one hand I'm proud of holiness and on the other hand it makes me feel physically unattractive. It doesn't help that my husband finds me more attractive adorned. Have you struggled with this? How have you overcome?

Sounds to me more like you struggle with "holiness standards" than holiness. Holiness has to do with a pure heart and obediance to God -- not a dress code. I am not saying God would or would not lead you to follow the dress code, but I do believe that, if He does, it would not be grevious to follow, but a joy. I can say that God has not led me that way, but I'm open to Him changing my heart if He desires me to. JMO.

[ddc101]

Someone said that their husband did not like the standards the UPC has because they are overboard in some areas.The reason he sees this is looking at it in the wrong perspective.Things we do for God are not things we have to do but things we get to do.
We need not live the bible like the Jews lived the law or even those around us.There ought to be some areas we are much more dedicated in than some organization that sets easy to follow rules.By the way ministerial organizations have rules of conduct and standards so that the ministry will be held accountable.Its good for our flesh to be held accountable.We don't want ministers in the pulpit who have no consecrations or dedications and feel they do not have to live a certain moral way to be in a leadership postion.I am not UPC and to be honest we live for God and many of the things we hold are much more conservative.lv sis.c

[NanaRenan]

...I found this thread interesting.

I've recently been posting on a group discussing/debating "Pentecostal Standards".

Mostly they're into slamming UPCI as judgemental and legalistic and everything that's wrong with religion. :flame:

I'm 3rd generation Pentecostal and struggled mightily with the standards. When I was in church I followed them, because I HAD to, but not out of a sincere desire to please God or a burning conviction in my heart. :o

Eventually, I was lead thru some hardships (still am today) that caused me to really seek God's face. When I drew closer to Him, the convictions set in and I was able to submit totally to the "standards" I had balked at for so long.

It was very freeing to give them up and I was able to move into a deeper spiritual realm than I had felt I was capable of. It's a wonderful place. And I think that's what I was wanting to share at this other website, instead, I ended up getting mauled verbally.

I like it better here, anyways! :spin:

[survivor4christ]

You know, I got saved over 12 years ago, and over time adhered to the standards of holiness that was taught by my pastor. I guess my testimony was like Sis. Delia's in that I was ready to give up even looking like I did in the world. See, I was raunchy, as wild looking as you could imagine. Mini skirts, hoochie style for that time, very provocative. And admittedly it got me into a lot of trouble. I have concluded that if women want to be respected, that they must conduct and carry themselves so that men will want to. If you walk in front of a man with a hoochie skirt or blouse, see through, or very revealing, then that man is gonna treat that woman like a tramp. Because she is dressed like one. Period. This world seems to not get that.

So give me my skirts almost to the ground. Give me my blouses that got to cover a portion of my arms, give me my modest apparel, because I don't want to trip up my brother(s). I don't want to attract a man any longer for what is on me, but by what is in me. And he cannot determine what is in my heart if he is too concentrated on my low cut blouse.

I think that our sisters look better once they are born again. In the world, they have that caked on look, Tammy Faye-like. Very phony and artificial. When God fills a woman with His Spirit, He clothes her with His Beauty, His Likeness! There is NO glow like the Holy Ghost glow! Maybelline, Revlon, Mary Kay, no one, can give that glow like the Holy Ghost! It's like the woman is walking around with a spotlight on her 24/7! The kind they put the models under to take those pixes in the magazines!

Thank God for His Glow!

For me, Sister, my adherence, and re-adherence, to holiness standards was a personal issue. Yes, I did it to submit to leadership. But more importantly to me, I want to be judged by my spirit, not my body. And when women dress immodestly, it demeans them. I had enough of allowing the enemy of my soul to demean me or steal from me. The only man who should see my calves or thighs is my husband, when God send him. Sleeveless--only my husband should see my flabby upper arms.

As far as appealing to your husband, pray for him. Pray that he appreciates your REAL beauty, not that put on stuff! B/c when he wakes up first thing in the morning, he won't see a put on, but the real you. That is the person he needs to adore, and cherish and be proud to show off his bride to the world, unblemished and all his! I will be praying with you!

My two cents!

Love,
Sis. Wenona

[ddc101]

Hi sisters I had this same conversation just this weak with a new person.The thing I cannot stress enough is that a person needs to do things with a pure heart and a clear conscience.We need to develop a relationship with Jesus and as he gives us knowledge we need to go forward applying that knowledge and be a doer of the word not just a hearer.That brings me to this explanation.
One lady who goes to an apostolic church told my new convert that she doesn't wear certain things due to causing others who are warring with lust etc to fall.But that is not why I do it.
I do it because I want to please the Lord.And I want to obey the word of the Lord in light of the scriptures on modesty.
I simply showed my friend the scripture and ask her to pray about it and ask Jesus to speak to her and lead and guide her into all truth.That I feel is enough for a new person.
I do not want to be God in a persons life and lay down the law and forbid this or forbid that.I want to lead them into a deeper relationship with Jesus and learn the word of God and then let them tell me why they are doing stuff and show me the scripture.I want to preach by my godly lifestyle more than by the words of my mouth.
If someone decides to do a certain something due to pressure or someone telling them that they have to or they will go to hell then they are more likely to discontinue that something as soon as they go through a trial or on a day when the flesh is gaining over the spirit.But if that person develops a relationship with Jesus and learns to pray then He will speak to their hearts and as the word goes forth it will be rooted and they will move into consecrations and committments.That is called a Christ centered life.
But I so often see ministers trying to be the only voice of God in a persons life.That will only develop saints that live an immature walk and are totally dependant on the ministry or pastor for every word of the Lord.It will develop a person who is lopsided and wobbles and sooner or later falls down and doesn't get back up.That is not what pleases the Lord.What pleases the Lord is when a person out of a pure heart obeys the word out of love for him.lv sis.c

[tufluv]

ddc101:
What pleases the Lord is when a person out of a pure heart obeys the word out of love for him.lv sis.c
Exactly!!!
As it should be.
If its a struggle, then its not love.

[ddc101]

Amen sister
I also want to add that it give me much joy to discuss things like this with you sisters.This is also how its supposed to be not with word wars.I thank the Lord for bringing me to the GNC and giving me sisters who are seeking more of him.lv sis.c

[BurningforJesus]

Amen sister
I also want to add that it give me much joy to discuss things like this with you sisters.This is also how its supposed to be not with word wars.I thank the Lord for bringing me to the GNC and giving me sisters who are seeking more of him.lv sis.c



AMEN!!! I totally agree. The ladies discussion board is the second discussion part I go to. I get encouragement and am starting to feel a bit more confidant to be able to post something with scipture and say where I am coming from and how I see it, without feeling like that post will be pulled apart and dissected.:) If you know what I mean ;) I will one day, do just that. Post with some meat in it.:)

Burning

[Abigail4476]

Hi Ladies,

I'm a first generation Pentecostal. I was saved at 17. Backslide at 21 and returned to church at 23. I am currently 29. I struggle with holiness in the sense that I feel conflicted within myself. On one hand I'm proud of holiness and on the other hand it makes me feel physically unattractive. It doesn't help that my husband finds me more attractive adorned. Have you struggled with this? How have you overcome?
My opinion? Remember that God created you and we are fearfully and wonderfully made. It is our media-influenced culture that makes women feel they must be "made-up" to be attractive. We are more liberated than most women of today, because we know that we are attractive in our own skin and don't have to conform to some media-created ideal in order to be beautiful.

If your husband finds you less attractive when you are "unadorned" then he needs to search his own heart before God and seek some wise advice from his pastor or other leaders on this matter. No wise husband would EVER insinuate his wife is unattractive, even if she were wearing a potato sack. The fact that he has even voiced such opinions shows that he has alot to learn in the hubby dept. and that has nothing to do with the religious aspect. ;)

I'd say if you met your husband in the bedroom with your totally unadorned skin he'd find that pretty attractive, and if he doesn't, then the problem isn't in your ballpark! :yeah:

[Blessed]

What helped me is that the bible says that God "hates every false way", and make-up is definitely false! I associate it with trying to be someone I am not, and make-up is only one of those ways. A good question to ask yourself is "Why do I want to do this?", and if it is in conflict to what your pastor teaches and the Word, it is usually the old devil tempting us to go astray.

[LilOrphanAnnie]

One point, I don't know if it has been made- The sacrificial altar was made out of uncut stones, stones nobody had hewn or shaped in any way. I think this is a good example of how we are to present our bodies as a living sacrifice- un"fixed" by makeup, hair-trimming, hair coloring, cosmetic surgery, and even (gasp, dare I say it) hair extensions!! (this includes ladies that can't grow it past their shoulders- I have seen many such ladies with long cornrow braids, all extensions- and it's excused-)

[ddc101]

I want to share that men say they like a certain thing but then when it all boils down they actually like women who do not intimidate them.They do not want their wives to look like a one night stand but a bride.This though does not excuse looking dowdy.Ladies should do good skin and nail care,eat right and exercise(thats where I fail) etc.I am working on these areas personally.
lv sis.c

[Blessed]

The Holy Ghost gives us a glow that no make-up can come close to. And I sure don't want to cover it up! I look around at our ladies sometimes and think how much prettier they are than women in the world with all their paint and baubles.
Even in nature the simplest things are usually the most becoming. A rose needs nothing more than its natural beauty. Neither does a deer, or horse (if you think those are pretty that is!). God made us to perfection just like everything else he created. Lets just.....BE.

[NanaRenan]

The Holy Ghost gives us a glow that no make-up can come close to. And I sure don't want to cover it up! I look around at our ladies sometimes and think how much prettier they are than women in the world with all their paint and baubles.
I can't remember if I posted this somewhere here in GNC and don't know where or if it was in another forum....but some friends and I were recently talking about how often our co-workers, etc. will remark about how "beautiful" Apostolic women who don't wear makeup are.

We decided, that apart from the Glow that the Holy Ghost gives, it's also because they don't see us any other way...we always look the same. Whereas people who always go around with their looks masked must never let it slip or the "image" is blown.

[Renee29]

My opinion? Remember that God created you and we are fearfully and wonderfully made. It is our media-influenced culture that makes women feel they must be "made-up" to be attractive. We are more liberated than most women of today, because we know that we are attractive in our own skin and don't have to conform to some media-created ideal in order to be beautiful.

If your husband finds you less attractive when you are "unadorned" then he needs to search his own heart before God and seek some wise advice from his pastor or other leaders on this matter. No wise husband would EVER insinuate his wife is unattractive, even if she were wearing a potato sack. The fact that he has even voiced such opinions shows that he has alot to learn in the hubby dept. and that has nothing to do with the religious aspect. ;)

I'd say if you met your husband in the bedroom with your totally unadorned skin he'd find that pretty attractive, and if he doesn't, then the problem isn't in your ballpark! :yeah:

My husband has never SAID he prefers me adorned, I'm just reading between the lines and making assumptions.

[bcook]

That's the flesh talking. Walk in the Spirit and see how you feel.



Hi Ladies,

I'm a first generation Pentecostal. I was saved at 17. Backslide at 21 and returned to church at 23. I am currently 29. I struggle with holiness in the sense that I feel conflicted within myself. On one hand I'm proud of holiness and on the other hand it makes me feel physically unattractive. It doesn't help that my husband finds me more attractive adorned. Have you struggled with this? How have you overcome?

[Abigail4476]

My husband has never SAID he prefers me adorned, I'm just reading between the lines and making assumptions. oh....from your previous post, it seemed he had specifically stated it....

It doesn't help that my husband finds me more attractive adorned. My husband has indicated to me on several occasions, quite clearly, that he prefers me without make-up...he doesn't like the idea of kissing lipstick, and he likes to see my freckles shine through...from things I have read, most men like the natural look, and that includes nonchristian men. (I've seen surveys in men's magazines my husband has lying around....) If your husband doesn't have a problem with it, then perhaps it's a personal/self-esteem issue, and we all have those....

Personally, I think we get so used to seeing a certain female ideal in the media, that when we look in the mirror we are shocked to see something different--and we feel pressured to try and make the two match. But inny waze....

Holiness standards, are, IMO, a measure of submission, not a matter of "holiness." I think a person should be in a church whose basic doctrines they agree with, and since it is virtually impossible to find an assembly that totally agrees with everything you believe, it is vital that once you choose one, you commit to being obedient to other teachings. (So as not to cause discord, and to make sure you fall under the "Obey those...." commandment.)

Choosing a church wisely in the first place helps prevent frustrations that come from constantly having to abide by rules that you don't feel are Biblical or necessary. There are some situations where (please don't throw tomatoes anyone) the rules are so many, and so petty, and so demanding, and so unreasonable, that people begin to feel oppressed, and the natural result of oppression is rebellion. That is not to make excuses for rebellion, but in many cases of overbearing leadership, rebellion is provoked.

Perhaps we could be more helpful if you could be more specific as to what "holiness" issues you are uncomfortable with.

As women, keep in mind that we have a tendency to have self-esteem issues,and that is just common to our gender. The best place to find confidence and find a strong identity is in prayer. When you spend time in prayer, somehow His identity takes over and your personal identity seems to fade away...and all the issues that go with it. If you feel unattractive, it may be more of an inward issue than an outward issue...

[Renee29]

oh....from your previous post, it seemed he had specifically stated it....

My husband has indicated to me on several occasions, quite clearly, that he prefers me without make-up...he doesn't like the idea of kissing lipstick, and he likes to see my freckles shine through...from things I have read, most men like the natural look, and that includes nonchristian men. (I've seen surveys in men's magazines my husband has lying around....) If your husband doesn't have a problem with it, then perhaps it's a personal/self-esteem issue, and we all have those....

Personally, I think we get so used to seeing a certain female ideal in the media, that when we look in the mirror we are shocked to see something different--and we feel pressured to try and make the two match. But inny waze....

Holiness standards, are, IMO, a measure of submission, not a matter of "holiness." I think a person should be in a church whose basic doctrines they agree with, and since it is virtually impossible to find an assembly that totally agrees with everything you believe, it is vital that once you choose one, you commit to being obedient to other teachings. (So as not to cause discord, and to make sure you fall under the "Obey those...." commandment.)

Choosing a church wisely in the first place helps prevent frustrations that come from constantly having to abide by rules that you don't feel are Biblical or necessary. There are some situations where (please don't throw tomatoes anyone) the rules are so many, and so petty, and so demanding, and so unreasonable, that people begin to feel oppressed, and the natural result of oppression is rebellion. That is not to make excuses for rebellion, but in many cases of overbearing leadership, rebellion is provoked.

Perhaps we could be more helpful if you could be more specific as to what "holiness" issues you are uncomfortable with.

As women, keep in mind that we have a tendency to have self-esteem issues,and that is just common to our gender. The best place to find confidence and find a strong identity is in prayer. When you spend time in prayer, somehow His identity takes over and your personal identity seems to fade away...and all the issues that go with it. If you feel unattractive, it may be more of an inward issue than an outward issue...

Even though I don't agree with everything my Pastor teaches, I don't have any problems obeying him because he is a very reasonable man. I can't really pinpoint an area of holiness, that I struggle with. I'm turning 30 in a month and I'm starting to look old. I have a few gray hairs, my eyes are starting to look funny etc. Some of these problems you can cover with cosmetics. I guess part of the problem is my upbringing, I had very critical parents. My mother still crys and tells me how ugly I am now that I'm in church. She literally crys and begs me to wear jewelery and makeup.

[Abigail4476]

Even though I don't agree with everything my Pastor teaches, I don't have any problems obeying him because he is a very reasonable man. I can't really pinpoint an area of holiness, that I struggle with. I'm turning 30 in a month and I'm starting to look old. I have a few gray hairs, my eyes are starting to look funny etc. Some of these problems you can cover with cosmetics. I guess part of the problem is my upbringing, I had very critical parents. My mother still crys and tells me how ugly I am now that I'm in church. She literally crys and begs me to wear jewelery and makeup.
Oh my. :( No offense, but your mama needs therapy. *gasp* I can't imagine telling my children ANYthing like that. *faints* *comes to and is again appalled*

I'm gonna pray for your mama.

Me, I've always thought that women begin to look their most beautiful as they enter their 30's and 40's...I'm looking forward to turning 30...well..okay, that wasn't an entirely honest statement...LOL...I don't look forward to getting older, because it reminds me that I'm going to die someday, but I don't fear it because of the bodily changes it brings...

With good nutrition, adequate rest, exercise and good grooming, you'll continue to look beautiful WITH the gray hair for many years to come.

This is another area where I think our culture has created an unfair standard for women...I mean, look at Sean Connery...he's old, has crow's feet, balding on top, and what hair he does have is gray...but yet he is still presented as an attractive man by the media. (And I agree with them) However, you don't see many WOMEN with crow's feet, gray hair and bald spots being held up as attractive icons. *sigh*

[Apostolic Kitty]

I guess part of the problem is my upbringing, I had very critical parents. My mother still crys and tells me how ugly I am now that I'm in church. She literally crys and begs me to wear jewelery and makeup.
That's tough. From the photo you used to have in your avatar, I'd say you were gorgeous...

[Apostolic Kitty]

Oh my. :( No offense, but your mama needs therapy. *gasp* I can't imagine telling my children ANYthing like that. *faints* *comes to and is again appalled*

I'm gonna pray for your mama.
A few years back when hubby and I were temporarily staying with my mom I was getting ready to begin a new job and had just gotten dressed to leave for work when she suggested I "put some make-up on". I was sitting there with what little make-up I do wear -- a touch of base and a bit of powder -- and told her something like, "Mom, you know some people don't even believe in wearing all that stuff". She's never bugged me again about make-up. LOL

My hubby also prefers me looking natural. He says most women who wear that stuff "look goofy". He also has an adversion to skinny women (what most of the world seems to think is beautiful). He says they need some meat on their bones. Good thing. I've never been skinny a day in my life....

[Renee29]

That's tough. From the photo you used to have in your avatar, I'd say you were gorgeous...

Thanks Kitty, the camera was kind to me.

[ddc101]

Sister Renee,
It sounds to me like your mom is not crying because you wear makeup and jewelry but because you are pentecostal? lv sis.c

[Melody]

I was a stawberry blonde when I was younger, but now I just tell people I am turning platinum (not grey) .:banana:

[Renee29]

Sister Renee,
It sounds to me like your mom is not crying because you wear makeup and jewelry but because you are pentecostal? lv sis.c

I think you hit the nail on the head. My sister-n-law rarely wears makeup, maybe a swipe of lipstick every once in awhile and my mom never bugs her about it.

[Blessed]

I think make-up makes you look older when you get a few wrinkles that it can settle into. YUCK! I started using Beauticontrol Regeneration Gold a few years ago after my skin started feeling dried out and LOTS of little wrinkles started around my eyes. I also had a large amount of sun damage (spots) due to years in the sun that I used to (before the Holy Ghost came) cover with make up. After about three months I began to see a big difference. I now have very minimal wrinkling and my spots are almost non-existent. People think I am much younger than I am. Thank you Beauticontrol!!!!!! One months worth sells for about $50 (If you use it twice daily. I use it once.), but you can get it on e-bay for about $25 or $30.
Just thought I'd let some in on my secret! Anybody else have any beauty secrets?

[ddc101]

What is Beauticontrol regeneration gold? I have never heard of it.lv sis.c

[Blessed]

What is Beauticontrol regeneration gold? I have never heard of it.lv sis.c
Beauticontrol is a company that is similar to Mary Kay, etc., only better products in my opinion. Regeneration Gold is one of their products made to reverse signs of aging, even out skin tone, and add elasticity. I have very sensitive skin and their products do not break me out.

[ddc101]

Sister,
I went to that Frocks and Frills site.It was awesome.In fact I saw pictures of friends there.Fancy that! lv sis.c

[Blessed]

Sister,
I went to that Frocks and Frills site.It was awesome.In fact I saw pictures of friends there.Fancy that! lv sis.c

That is Sis. Marion Reeves (whom attends our church) dress shop and website.
I used to help her with her teas until I started working full time :( . It was hard work, but alot of fun, too.